Consuming Thoughts

I hesitated to share this.
Please forgive my self reflection, but I know I'm not alone in this...

I have just had a revelation that may not be a revelation to those who know me. I am very picky (well, I knew that part), but I am picky to the point that I like everything a certain way and when it's not, it really bothers me. I mean, sometimes things not being a certain way overly consumes my thoughts. I try to figure out a way to make everything...and I mean everything the way I would like it to be. When I finally get something the way I like it...then I'm satisfied and can rest my mind.
For example: I looked for a GPS unit for about a year before I finally committed to buying one. I studied and researched and played with them at electronic stores etc...to the point it consumed my thoughts on a daily basis. I absolutely had to understand every GPS out there, including using GPS on a small laptop, phone or a portable media device. I became an expert in a pointless pursuit. I did finally make a decision and felt really good that I got exactly the GPS I wanted out of every GPS available in the entire world (I'm not kidding). I am like this with most everything. The good part is when I find something I like, I'm satisfied and pretty much will stick with it. (I bought 3 pairs of one shoe that I liked). I think this can be a good trait, but the problem I see is the time spent (literal and in my mind) trying to satisfy my every desire. This can be a problem. The temptation is to place this same type of standard on my family and friends. I really only have a few carefully chosen close friends partly because of this reason. Friends should first of all, be without reserve those who are part of my church family. They are my brothers and sisters and God is the one Who chooses them, not me. Therefore, my urge to analyze exactly the type of friend I want is thus unnecessary and even evil. The urge instead needs to be an analytical analysis of how to help my brothers and sisters be more like Christ and not meeting my own selfish desires. AND!..this must first start with myself! Yes, I do this and to the point where I'm over critical...I'm never to the point where I'm satisfied. This is good in one sense, but debilitating in another. My mind can be over consumed with my inadequacies. I know I'm not the only person who struggles with this and thus my comment (lest I be self-indulging). My friends, may we not be over consumed with any thoughts, but with Jesus Christ. Our minds can never think on Him too much and we will never be "satisfied", for we do not have enough years to analyze and understand this God Who died for us. What can contain the intricacies of our God? Can words? Can thoughts? Can this universe? All are contained within Him. Our minds can not grasp this and yet there is a peace. Our peace is in our trusting of Him. Faith in this Infinite God. Faith in our Loving God. Love is Who He is and yet this word does not contain Him. He is ... and I almost tremble anytime I read, write or type His name...He is...I AM. (fall to the ground in your mind and heart)No explanation needed, for He is Who He is and we except by faith He will do what He will do, because of Who He is. One thing we do know for sure...He first loved us and gave Himself for us. Thus we love Him, because He first loved us. Let us rest in one thing...that we know Him and that we will continually know Him. We do not need to look for another! He is our everything. Analyze yes, but with a confidence that He is the very God of the Universe and there is no other. We analyze not if He is the God to follow, but rather how we are to follow this God and to know more of Who our Father is. Thank God for His Word that gives us exactly what we need to know of Him right now. Let us know Him in spirit and in truth. Let us know you oh God! Give us good gifts Father! Give us not a stone! We are hungry and thirsty! Fill us O Lord! We desire not candy, but real food! Thank you O Father that You are Good. You are Loving. You are Merciful. You are All-Knowing and thus we rest our thoughts in You. Consume our thoughts.

Consume our thoughts.